Ever a Queen

Ever a Queen

“To move, act, or proceed clumsily.”  How rude.  People can be so insensitive to my reality.  I am not fat lazy or uncommitted. I do NOT present an awkward manner and I am capable of, and do, lead a productive, meaningful life.  But you insist on calling me and my kind “Bumble” bees.

Throughout history your so-called scientists have proclaimed that I cannot fly. I am supposedly incapable of lifting my curvaceous body into the heavens.  But for centuries I have proven them all wrong as I go about my business easily flying from flower to flower.  I actually have a very sophisticated physiology so that, not unlike a helicopter, my vibrating rather than contracting muscles can affect aeronautical dynamic stall. I generate lift.  I don’t think much about all the fuss; rather, I just continue gracefully meandering through my busy day. Flying.

I am a social creature but I do not like the urban congestion of the citified honey bee. Rather, I chose to live in small colonies of about 50 individuals.  As Queen I decide who and what my offspring shall be.  If I choose to fertilize my eggs I can make another queen or female. Otherwise I will not fertilize and my eggs will produce male workers.  My females are also capable of reproduction, but I normally repress that with my hormonal pheromones.  When the colony needs more workers, I can allow my females to produce haploid (unfertilized) males. I only mention all this so you are corrected as to any belief that I am not attractive enough for others to desire me.  I assure you, I can turn as many heads as the most fragrant lily. Yellow and black is a very fashion forward combination as well.

Another of your annoying misconceptions is that I cannot sting.  Whooo- Ha, could you ever be in for a surprise.  While my males are relatively defenseless, (You mammals could take this under advisement) I can assure you that all my females and myself are empowered to take care of ourselves.  Being much more cultured and temperate than those over-rated high-strung wasps and honeybees, we can not only sting, but our stingers are not barbed. For those of you who paid little attention in basic biology, that means, unlike the honeybee, we do not lose our stinger when first deployed. We live to sting again and again. So tread lightly and don’t aggravate me.

My kind also provides valuable service in society.  We pollinate both crops and flowers and ensure the survival of many botanicals. We cover areas of up to 2 kilometers, so if you see me out and about, we are probably neighbors as my colony is nearby.  Come fall, I seek an insulated nest below ground, many times in the former habitat of ground dwelling mammals.  I overwinter in these nests and come out in the spring to start a new colony. Once I have created a new colony and queen, my time here is over and I slip across the mortal realm to bee heaven.

But, darlings, this mislabeling me as an insipid, directionless and, well, “bumbling” creature is slander and I wish you’d stop it NOW because you’re starting to annoy me.

The bee is one of my works using  iridescent watercolors

 

-Jerry Wendt 2013 530 words